
Léon: The Professional
1994
The enigmatic resurrection, rampage, and retribution of an undead monster in a remote wilderness unleashes an iconic new killer after a locket is removed from a collapsed fire tower that entombed its rotting corpse.
Kristen MacCulloch
The Ranger
Kris
Johnny
Aurora
Troy
Colt
7/16/2024
5/10
So guess what... A group of loud and brash twenty-somethings decide to take a weekend break in a remote cabin and manage to arouse the wrath of a long buried corpse who emerges and wreaks havoc on them and the poor old park ranger (Reece Presley). Sound familiar? That's probably because this hasn't an original bone in it's body and after about fifteen minutes I suspect you'll just think these kids actually deserve everything that "Johnny" can come up with. The victims are the usual mix of couples who are together, were together, want to be together; there's the obligatory couple of lesbians (though not for long) and way, way, too many meandering shots of the malevolent critter walking through the woods time and time again. There's some quite entertainingly graphic use of visual effects now and again as he makes good use of his chain, spike, hook and axe - but the big question is: can he be stopped before auteur Chris Nash starts thinking sequel? I suppose the moral of the story is - don't take things that don't belong to you; and maybe if this were shown in primary schools across the country, it might serve as an effective illustration of the risks of violating the seventh commandment. Mercifully, there's not much dialogue to speak of leaving us with a standard forest slasher that will be fine for wallpaper on the television after you've had a few pints.
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