When evil, inbred, cannibal, devilish, prehistoric, underground piranha are unleashed on the tiny town of Lake Victoria during "Spring Break", the outcome is all rather predictable. Babes, bikinis, boobs, bums, blood, bazulco and bad acting. Run from a budget of $24M the film has almost no actors of note in lead roles. Although there is a cameo from Eli Roth (_Inglourious Basterds_), which is always cool. What we have here, is a virtually flawless example of stupid fun. There's no point in trying to evaluate a film like _Piranha 3D_ on factors like good taste, because it goes out of its way to smash these conventions apart. The film has this crazy energy about it from beginning to end. It also however, is the perfect example of why 3D is so fucking unnecessary. And though I appreciate how forward the film is, that doesn't make it strictly speaking good. It's part creature-feature, part horror-comedy, but it doesn't stand up in a thrill sense to actual monster movies like _Anaconda_ or _King Kong_, and it doesn't stand up in a humour sense to actual horror comedy like _Shaun of the Dead_ or _Dead Snow_, but it sort of takes off on its own in a passable manner. Though it's kiiinda humorous, the film is mostly just "fun", as opposed to "funny". The script seems cobbled together with a couple of different half assed plot points, but several half ass plots taped together is better than just one half assed plot trying to hold its own and ending up looking like no plot at all. Exploitation has never really been A-grade material, and even though the "suspension of disbelief" thing that films are supposed to have as a general rule, is sort of... not here, _Piranha 3D_ still manages to somehow get this piece of crap off the ground. I watched it at about 2am with a male friend of mine who has very similar taste and sense of humour to me, and that's pretty much got to be the best possible setting to watch it in. The CG gore is ridiculous, the 3D focus is ridiculous, the film itself is just fucking ridiculous. But brainless is great sometimes, just don't make a habit of thinking that you can get away with bad exploitation, and calling it Black Comedy, once or twice is fine, but soon it just looks like you're aiming for cult, and getting lazy. -Gimly

Piranha hunt in packs - not for protection, but for overwhelming force. Actually many of today's younger multiplex goers hunt in packs, they know what they like and they know how to have a good time with even the most crude or banal movie. I don't mean that as an insult, it's just indicative of the film market available to them, it's the reason why films like this here Piranha remake/re-imaging/re-jig exists and makes money. Even "spawning" a franchise on occasions. Alexandre Aja's Piranha 3D is a complete machine gun of a movie, it knew exactly how to sell tickets at the box office. Even before the 3D was used as a selling point, the word down the grapevine was the promise of lithe bodies in beach wear and loads of CGI killer fish shredding the hell out of a whole community. And that's exactly what is delivered, only with extras that see considerable nudity in the mammary areas and Elisabeth Shue and Ving Rhames kicking buttocks. It's all very bloody, even lurid and exploitive, while it's difficult to know if you are meant to laugh, scream or do something that Russ Meyer would endorse? But, and I say this as a middle aged old fart, there is so much fun to be had here if you are prepared to unscrew your head and take out your brain. Strap yourselves in Piranha 3D haters, your grandchildren might just be enjoying in the future: Piranha 27: Sexy Mechanoid Bimbos Fight Back. But will they hate themselves in the morning? 7/10

<em>'Piranha 3D'</em> does attempt something a bit different to the film it remakes (unlike the 1995 redo) and parts are decent (e.g. the gore), though all things considered it's not a movie I'd wanna revisit. It isn't as concise or as fun as Joe Dante's flick, the effects aren't the most convincing either. The 3D portions are funny to see all these years later (in 2D, obvs). I was never a fan of that format, so I'm glad it never stuck around - pure gimmick. Going back to the effects, the piranha's usage and design underwhelm. I also said this in my review of the 1978 flick's sequel, but: less is more. The cast are alright. Elisabeth Shue is the clear standout, her character is actually quite cool in terms of what she does and how she handles herself; not a female character that is only there for their looks, like most are here to be frank. Elsewhere, Steven R. McQueen is solid too. Interesting to see the involvement of Kelly Brook, someone I know from her work away from film; smart casting, to be fair. Away from those, Jessica Szohr is decent, though Jerry O'Connell is rubbish. Adam Scott, Ving Rhames and Christopher Lloyd also appear, Richard Dreyfuss too. It is better than the other 'follow-ups' to the original and I didn't find it to be absolutely bad, so I guess it merits small praise for that. Still, not one I'd recommend.